No one likes to walk around being judged or looked upon as being anything less than who we are. The unfortunate thing is that we judge ourselves all the time. We criticize ourselves about our looks, mindset, who we are, and our uniqueness. We call ourselves really terrible names like stupid, ugly, not worthy, or not good enough for self or others. We are living in a world, where judgment is the norm of our humanistic experiences. We see on the news, gossip shows, other media content, family, friends, strangers, our workplace, and society (racism). Judging can be a large part of your reality especially if you do it too yourself on a consistent basis.
When you are told so many times that you are not worthy or good enough especially individuals who were subjected to some sort of abuse as a child and adult hearing and seeing this is the norm for them. I feel it is tolerated in too many places. Most of the time, many began to believe that’s who they are. Then you some women who began to develop the behavior of trying to please of others so their perspective of self can begin to change. Many of us believe we get our sense of worthiness from others.
I use to believe that so much, in fact it was hard for not to believe until I allowed Christ to be in my life. I would do anything to stop myself from being my true self so that others could feel good about themselves. I didn’t care if I suffered inside but as long as others were happy I was too.
Writing this statement makes me recognize my true growth. I was subjected to cruel judgment by others especially family and other authority figures. When you place your worthy in others, you will never began to recognize that you were meant to become whole within. When you find your worth through Christ, you are aware and believe your worth comes from the Lord that you began running towards the journey of being whole because you know that its meant to be.
1 Corinthians 11:31-32 CEV, “But if we were more discerning with regard to ourselves, we would not come under such judgment. Nevertheless, when we are judged in this way by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be finally condemned with the world.”
I like to say that God doesn’t judge us but he definitely will convict us, where many may feel judge because no one is used to hearing constructive criticism about self. Constructive Criticism produces change. We have to recognize the shadow that lies within us. When we believe and stay focus on our worth through Christ and not our families, friends, and society. We will begin to understand that we are enough and worthy of having anything God says we can have.
When we place our worthiness based on our families, friends, and other people in general; it is subjected to change so much that it can never be persistent. This allows you began to live out the dreams and goals of others. Where you will end up in a place not feeling joyful or fulfilled within. We must get to a point in ourselves, where we can examine ourselves by holding ourselves accountable for our actions, thoughts, and feelings. We must be careful not to judge ourselves to the point of lower our vibrations that leads to low self-esteem and self-worth. The best habit to obtain to stop judging yourself is positive affirmations and trusting that you can do all things through Christ Jesus who will strengthen you.
Telling yourself that you are doing well with what you were given and in the capacity, it was given to you is emotional growth. Recognizing that you did your best regardless of the outcome definitely take a long process to achieve. This is also spiritual growth because you have gained the wisdom that good things take time. It’s a process of stripping away anything or anyone who doesn’t serve you based on who God’s says you are. I mean, we were all created by him, he knows us better than we know ourselves. You have to remind yourself so much until you began to believe it and advocate for your self-worth when others began to judge you based on your actions.
No one is perfect not even myself but we also cannot allow others to place us on that stance either because that’s an expectation that none of us could ever live up too. I began to discover that people and the circumstances I judge was a reflection of me judging myself. Telling myself I wasn’t worthy enough, pretty enough, good enough for anything. I am at a point in my life, where I am aware of the way I judge others. I am currently working on allowing my intuition to guide me more and not my thoughts. For when the heart is clean so is the mind. When you accept who you are, you began to love yourself more, and care about yourself more. What and how you view others within reflects the way you see others.
I am beginning to recognize that we are all trying to find where we fit in this world. I believe it’s best to figure out, where we fit in with Christ first, so we can begin to make room within by stripping us of anything less than who we are. This is the time to free yourself of judgment and stop being your worst critic. You will get to this point when you get tired of living with dysfunction (relationships jobs, thoughts, and etc.). This is where you began discerns others based on their hearts rather than their actions, looks, and worth.
The time speaks now to free yourself from judging yourself so that the reality in front of you can change. Once, you reach this point in your life, you will never look back again because you know you are worth so much more than you believed it was in the past.