I am always pushing for self-love, but being honest with myself and you all. Self-criticism and self-judgment tend to take over when things in my life are not going perfectly or when I do something wrong. Self- criticism is when you judge oneself. Self-judgment are thoughts that we hold about oneself and those thoughts are …
I spoke about suffering from people-pleasing in a previous blog post, but this time I want to talk about suffering from the fear of lack and loss. Fearing lack and loss involves being fearful of losing or lacking people, place, or things in your life. If lack and loss is a part of life then why …
Never tell your Right hand what the Left hand is doing. That’s an old saying that means keep your business to yourself and don’t tell the next person your next move. I reached a point, where I needed to overcome the feeling of nostalgia to begin to spend money more fruitfully (producing useful or desired …
Trust provides security. With so much drama and unpleasant things going on in the world today; many are losing trust in people and the systems around them. The many different things others have used to shape their lives are currently being revamped or destroyed. Trust is lost when expectations are broken. That’s for relationships, the workforce, …
Being honest with ourselves, no one likes to experience obstacles, but we have adapted to the fact that obstacles are a way of life. Obstacles come in different shapes or forms which corresponds to the individual’s way of learning in life. The number 13 represents obstacles but usually falls into a blessing in disguise. So many …
The year of 2018 was a year of letting go and growth. Going in 2018, I thought it was going to be this magnificent year, where my life would be free of hurt, pain, and sorrow from the previous years that once held me back from being my true self. That was true, but since …
This blog post is for those who have deep soul yearning to walk their own path in life, but have everything in the world telling them they are insufficient, they are not good enough, too old, and too ugly to walk the path that God has asked you walk on. This blog post is for those who are willing to walk their own path, but they are stuck because they are distracted by fear of lack and lost. This blog post is for those who are trying to find strength and the courage to walk a path that no one has walked ever walked on in their family or in their neighborhoods.
My response to that is the sky is your limit. I believe that most of us are walking with depression, anxiety, and constant stress because we are either functioning in realm that we are not meant to walk in or we are living a life that goes against our spiritual path or calling. Many feel that their lives should corresponds to the opinions and the perspectives of others. We must ask ourselves are we living for others or are we living for God. For those who have not fully committed their lives to God, this is for you also because you know that there is deeper calling for your life, but you cannot find anyone around you for guidance or trustworthy enough to do so.
This week has taught me that it is not me against the world, but me against self. I fought the battle of the ego verse the soul, which is the concept of learning where my thoughts, behavior, and actions stemmed from. I mention before in my last blog post called the battle between the Ego and the Soul that battle was based off living with survival methods that were developed through trauma, hurt, pain, and sorrow. That was a year ago, but life has been teaching me today that I am in consistent competition with myself.
This is the best time of the year, but also the most stressful time for many. Holiday season is here, and everyone is currently scrambling around the mall and department stores to figure out new ways to express their love to others with material possessions. Sales are flowing and debt is rising for others to keep up with the Jones and trends that they may not be able to afford. Now, everyone has their different intentions about buying gifts, but I feel what a lot of people are missing today is the true love and joy that holidays are supposed to bring.
I must ask myself and you all were the holidays ever filled with love or joy or was it just that everyone was agreeing to live a fantasy that was always broadcasted on television. Maybe the feel of the holidays isn’t changing because maybe it’s our concept and intentions of self and life that may be time to change for the holidays to fill great again. Our holidays in America have been based on gluttony, greed, jealousy, and pride. It is an honest question for us to ask ourselves what are the purpose of us celebrating Christmas, Thanksgiving, and New Year’s, when we are left being broke, stressed, tired, and overwhelmed when the new year hits. (more…)
Let’s not harden our hearts in a world that expects us to give up and not stand our grounds. We live in a world that expect us continue to walk around with our head held low and continuing to allow our egos to lead us and harm us at the same time. We live in a way world where the truth is frown upon and lies are celebrated. There is power in the name of Jesus. There is power in his name that lifts darkness out of your sphere. There is pain that strengthens you spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially.
The most difficult thing that I am beginning to understand is the concept of learning to stay in my own lane., where I am learning to follow my own path instead of following someone else’s path. I am beginning to appreciate the person I am beside focusing on all the hurtful things of my past.
I used to have a bad habit of getting distracted by trying to fix other people’s problems except for my own. I would sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of others who were miserable because I have a huge heart of wanting to make others happy. (more…)
No one likes to walk around being judged or looked upon as being anything less than who we are. The unfortunate thing is that we judge ourselves all the time. We criticize ourselves about our looks, mindset, who we are, and our uniqueness. We call ourselves really terrible names like stupid, ugly, not worthy, or not good enough for self or others. We are living in a world, where judgment is the norm of our humanistic experiences. We see on the news, gossip shows, other media content, family, friends, strangers, our workplace, and society (racism). Judging can be a large part of your reality especially if you do it too yourself on a consistent basis.
In the words of Oprah Winfrey, “Living in the moment means letting go of the past and not waiting for the future. It means living your life consciously aware that each moment you breathe is a gift.”
Let’s talk about what many seem to have issue with, which is balancing the past, present, and future. Some of us have faced some difficult situations of the past much like myself, which keeps a lot of us stuck from moving forward.
It would be ideal if I could admit that I have overcome and conquered this issue, but I am still a working progress. I am a woman who tends to carry things, in fact I am quite good at carrying the weight of life. This is not always something to be proud of, but I am making room to be able to carry prosperous things of life instead of things from my past life that resulted in anger, frustration, lack of emotional support, and any other negative emotions. (more…)
Unfortunately, we have faced a lot of tragedies recently in the United States involving innocent people dying in the hands of one person due to mental health issues. Like the recent California bar shooting this past week. We can walk around with fear and continue to go by our business speaking superficially about material possessions, titles, promotions, or Accolades. Or we can begin to look at ourselves and do the work within so another life can be spare. We must understand that darkness lives within all of us, where it may come easier to some than others.
I battle with making the right choices all the time. I am aware that the choices I make will influence my present and future. Thinking about that concept can produce anxiety, but then I know and recognize that God is on your side. The odds can never be against me. I used to walk around with a large R and G on my chest. The G did not stand for God but it stood for Guilt. The R was not for righteousness, but it was for regret. Now, guilt can be advantage to bring forth self-awareness to your wrongful choices, but guilt can also be a disadvantage when you attach it to your identity based off the choice you made. We all make choices every second of the day, but there are many choices being made today among our society based off of ego. (more…)
Have you ever feared of being broke that you ended up buying more than you need? How about spending more than you can afford with your credit cards? Do you shop based on what appeals to the eye? Are you living paycheck to paycheck? Are you a responsible spender? Do you overwork yourself just to sustain the material possessions for your lifestyle? If you answer yes to these questions than I would say you are suffering from the fear of lack and loss. I always had my mind on my money and money was on my mind (Snoop Dogg). This is a very stressful mindset to have because I could never appreciate what was in front of me. (more…)
Self-management is something you rarely see in others today. Self-management is management of or by oneself; or deciding to take of responsibility for one’s own behavior and well-being. We are a part of society, where everyone wants to play the blame game.
We blame our government, we blame our family issues, and we blame everything that is external of us for our life, actions, thoughts, attitude, and behavior. They may influence your life, but they cannot control your life unless you allow them too.
You have options. Many of us have never and probably will never take the time be still and to truly begin to assess who we truly are within. I would be lying if I told you all that everyone isn’t fit to do it; but in fact, everyone is. The barrier that stands in everyone’s way is self! Many of us lack the patience or belief in who God says we truly are within. (more…)
In the words of a Wise Queen Maya Angelou, “Determine to Live with Flair and Laughter”. Maya Angelou words of wisdom spoke to my soul, it speaks self-belief, confidence, self-esteem and courage. It speaks to my soul because a lot times I found myself living in less and living without flair and laughter. I would find myself moping, groaning, and complaining about things that did not show up as I expected in life.
I found it hard to praise God for God because he had given me less than what I expected. I had grown so accustomed to a childish concept that I told me that “more was better no matter what the circumstance was”. I had grown attached to my selfish attitude that manifested thoughts that said, “I want what I want, and nothing less.” If I got less than what I expected, I would moan and groan, and began to find ways to manipulate circumstances to get what I desire.
Wouldn’t life be better if we were able to plan our own life and depend on our own understanding? wouldn’t life be great if we were able to get everything we wanted and desired to have? Or imagine life being so great that we could have everything our way and no other way. If you agree with the statements above I am sure that you have a hard time embracing the flow of life.
Well, to being honest with you all. I had a hard time going with the flow of life also. I had to know exactly what was going on so I could make the decision rather or not the circumstance was right for me. Having control was inherited from my family and trauma I experienced. (more…)
There is nothing more frighten than facing a difficult situation in life with no sense of direction, guidance, and instructions. God knew what he was doing when he created me! God created me so I would always depend on his direction, guidance, and instruction no matter what situation was. The problem from past experiences was that I would relie deeply on others to direct, guide, and instruct me into the path I was desired to go. When I was looking for others to help me, I would either get bamboozled, mislead, or misguided.
It took countless situations and circumstances for me to understand that it was not meant for me to be guided, lead, and instructed by others. It was time for me to allow Jesus to lead me to places I could never dream of. Thinking about this was a bit frighten for me because I have always presented myself to be self-sufficient, where I thought I could only rely on my own thoughts and wisdom. Not knowing that I was being feed by my own ego; but I was also not allowing the Holy Spirit to guide me in all areas in my life.
Facing countless situations, where my time was wasted or I spent most of my time focusing on too many things at once. I began to lose hope in life and present situations because things in my life appeared to be too hard for me to handle. I lost many battles with quitting things in life too soon such as personal romantic relationships, business ideas, and networking opportunities. I was tired of taking L’s (losses) in life, where I knew my life was not set up for me to follow my own path, but to finally time for me to allow God to guide, lead and instruct me all areas of my life. Here are five ways I gained hope in life:
It’s a simple concept that many tend to take for granted including myself. The world is full of hopeless situations, but if you don’t remember anything from this blog post. Remember all you must do is believe. Believe in the Higher One, the One who created you and believe that your life serves a great purpose. There should be a sense of relieve within to know that you were created for a time such as now. I call my higher one God or Jesus, but I feel everyone has a different interpretation of who their higher power is.
2.Set Your Intentions for the Situation or Circumstance
You will go through many different and difficult situations in life, but you must always make sure that your intentions correspond to the outcome you aspire to have. Your intentions create your reality and it manifest the vision you dream to have. The soul knows what it wants and needs. You must be still enough to allow your soul to connect with your inner-knowing to live out your desire outcome. Trust your current situation or circumstance may be overbearing for another person, but this different situation or circumstance was designed for your life to help you grow and develop into your higher self. You deserve to raise not sink!
3.Raise with Faith
One of my beloved bible verses that helped me get through some very hard situations is Hebrews 11:1,“Faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see. “Faith corresponds with hope. Your faith can be size of a mustard seed and God will still extend his Grace to you. Have faith in God that your struggle is shaping you into the person, you prayed God to create you to be. Have faith that you will find another job that better suits who you are.
Have faith that you find true love in your life because you are worthy of having all you deserve to have plus some. Have faith today that God has not forsaken you in this heart-aching situation. Have faith that you were born to be a champion, who wins every battle that heads your way.
4.Reorganize and Restructure Your Plan
When stress began to raise above your head with your family, financials, and job, it may be a great opportunity to start restructuring and reorganizing your life. Your life now may have come into a season, where you can no longer complete a task in the same way and get a different outcome. Our lives are meant to be versatile. When we are open to versatile our creativity within began to develop. You were born to fly not sunk. Begin to create some structure and order into your life, so that things in your life will began to go more smoothly. You deserve peace. Creating order, structure, and organization will help you create the peace you needed within.
5.Pray and Push Through
I had to save the best for last because I wanted to emphasis the importance of praying and pushing your way through. Hope requires prayer and pushing your way through even when the situation looks daunting. We deserve to see what life can offer us. There have been countless times in my life, where life looked very daunting. I had no choice but to pray my way through because I had no one around who could understand me. I refused to give up. Instead of staying low; I decided to raise above and pray to God.
I knew he was my only option, who could help me see my way through. I guarantee God will help you push and see your way through also. I don’t care what anyone has told you, but God is a great investment to consider. You will always profit from the decisions and actions from him because he holds the greatest interest of life.
Whether you believe it or not. It takes believing in yourself to know that there is a bigger calling and purpose upon your life; it takes your intentions to set the tone of your situation; it takes Faith to sustain your belief system of reaching for those things that are before us; It is reorganization and restructuring to help you prepare for the new that wants to blossom in your life; and finally, it takes prayer and pushing through to help you to become open to the miracles that God believe you deserve in your life.
Be purposeful today and allow the spirit of Hope to guide, direct, and instruct you in all areas of your life. In the words of Hebrew 10:23 CEV, “WE MUST HOLD TIGHTLY TO THE HOPE WE SAY IS OURS. AFTER ALL, WE CAN TRUST THE ONE WHO MADE THE AGREEMENT WITH US. Hope is meant for our keepsake nothing less.
I was a shopaholic, where I felt I needed to buy whatever caught my eye. Since I was traveling in a lustful stage in my life, every piece of clothing that caught my eye I bought to feel worthy within my presence state of being. If it was not clothing; it was food, and other unnecessary materials.
Since I healed from the feelings of being unworthy and unfulfilled; I was stuck with a lot of clutter in my home. I began to discover that having less was much better than more! It was less stressful, I had less anxiety, there was less maintenance, and I gained peace by just deciding to de-clutter my space.
I couldn’t wait to sit with peace after throwing away the clutter that was meant to leave. The time was coming to let go of what was and began to embrace what is in my life. For the old served its purpose in my life, but now it was time for me to embrace the new! (more…)
The entire process of healing can be long and painful, but healing is necessary to produce fruit within the soul. A lot of people would rather avoid painful situations and circumstances in life because of the connection or attachment that they carry to the pain.
Sometimes something can hurt so badly that you began to attach the pain with fear of lack and loss. We all know we gain something from pain, but there also apart of us that dies. It seems like we focus so much on the fear of lack and loss but we never get a chance to embrace what we gain. (more…)
Growing up as a black girl and into a black woman; independent was what I thought I needed to be! I wanted to be independent so badly that Neyo’s song “Miss Independent” became my theme song.
I mean, many of the women in my family played the role really well. Being a single woman and mother on her own and making ends meets by any means necessary looked like power from a concrete perspective.
Having my own and building my own seemed ideal. When pain showed up in my life; independence became apart of my identity! I think that independence as an notion is an illusion that was created through sorrow and pain! It was promoted in society to embrace our ego and gain power in areas that we felt we were weak or taken advantage of in society.
I thought I was born to be independent because I was the only child growing up. I was taught not to depend on a man, friends,or strangers in general. As a kid, growing I didn’t know who to really trust. When abuse showed up, being independent only intensified.
I depended on the notion of being independent so bad that I wouldn’t allow myself to ask for help when I needed it. I didn’t want others to see how incapable I was of doing anything. Choosing to be independent taught me that pride was my hero, ego was my guardian, and arrogance was the true act of self love.
I had grown to be so independent that when someone came across being too nice me that I was not use too; I would instantly think that they needed something from me or they were coming to take something from me.
Independence sold me the ideation that I was free from the outside world and no one could control me. I felt I didn’t have to depend on authority, which I questioned a lot! My arrogance always told me that I was more fit for any job than others in any situation.
Independence began to ruin the relationships in my life because I wouldn’t balance the concept of receiving and giving in my relationships (reciprocation). With so many of my relationships on thin ice, I knew it was time for me to make a decision that would involve sacrificing my independence for relationships.
It wasn’t until I was introduced to interdependence is when I began thank God for second chances. Interdependence is when one or more people depend on one another. The prefix of inter means between, mutually, or reciprocal. The prefix of in- is no or not.
Interdependence takes the stamina away from our generation of being submissive to anyone appointed with authority. The concept allows us to understand that real relationships; free from a fractured heart requires interdependence because a union is better than one in many cases in life.
Interdependence allowed me to understand that it was ok to be vulnerable and admit I need help. God relies on interdependence than independence. Interdependence involves less worrying, stressing ,and anxiousness.
When you think about it, there aren’t many relationships in life that truly require us to be independent. We adapt independence to many areas in our life and wonder why we are sworn illness, disease, and disorders.
A relationship with God is more about interdependence than independent. In fact, we weren’t meant to hold on or carry the weight,pressure, and velocity of this world. We were meant to be of this world not in, which means we should always stand out in the crowd.
Interdependence allowed me to recognize how important it was for me to live a selfless life. Interdependence also showed me how fulfilling it was to know that I was protected and being provided for as long I stayed in my own lane.
Putting God first in everything I did in life allowed me to discover that interdependence gave me more spiritual freedom and independence gave me egotistic freedom. Independence kept me bounded and interdependence taught there was more power in being selfless than selfish!
I believe the hardest things I ever had to face was the shadow that lies within me. The shadow represents the dark area within us that lacks light! So, you know I use to have a issue with being a perfectionist, which meant I never saw my flaws.
I definitely saw the flaws in others, but not myself! In fact, in many cases in life I refused to do so, and I grew comfortable not wanting to focus on what I lacked in life. When I was exposed to my flaws; I would disguised them pride, ego, lies, and with defensiveness.
I could not imagine facing my flaws so I would hide my body with baggy clothes, closed my mouth to the truth, became blind to what’s was in front of me, detached myself from emotions, and distance myself from giving affection to those I truly loved the most!
I was starting to head towards a journey filled with numbness,detachment,and low self-esteem. I told myself that this was who I would be to protect myself from the fear of the unknown. The funny thing about it, I grew accustomed to those characteristics that I began to attached them to my identity.
When God delivered me it was a long process for me to detach from those features. It was hard because I found out I had another attribute hiding deep down within me, which was control. Control was the root of all my issues in life. (more…)
As a Kid, I strongly disliked for the adults in my family to tell me to wait until my food digest, so that I could have dessert. As far as I could remember, it has always been difficult for me to wait for good things to happen to me. I could never understand why I couldn’t just have the good things now; and why I couldn’t have my gift now that I knew worked so hard to earn.
Some would say that the adults in my family did the right thing by withholding my dessert until I had more room to receive. Some would say that the adults in my family should have given me the dessert because it was something that I truly wanted and I worked so hard to eat all the food that was given to me. Both perspectives can be thought through Thoroughly and great arguments can be developed and considered.
I grew up so accustomed to being impatient that being patient never seem like a goal that I would ever get to achieve. So, I would settle for just a enough to get by or settle for less than what I deserve because I felt I had the power to change the external things around me or a person into my own favor (manipulation) . I grew accustomed to microwave meals as adult even though I grew up with well-prep meals made from the oven. (more…)
I thought the true vision of being free to become was wild, reckless, and rebellious because I didn’t agree with the order and structure within my workplace, family, relationships, and society. I knew within that I didn’t have to live my life the way others attended too. I knew I deserve more and others around did too.
Most of the time, I chose to try to change others before focusing on self. That obviously didn’t work. Now, that I look at it; I was being really lazy! I knew it would take some hard work, effort, and dedication to change within to be free to become. At the same time, it’s seemed more easy to change others than myself. In fact, it was quite the opposite.
The true meaning of being free to become doesn’t come in the size, capacity, length, and depth that we anticipate most of the time. There are different aspects of being free to become within, in which all have to be in alignment to God’s words upon your life. (more…)
We currently live in a society, where we like to place the blame on everyone who hurt us or wounded us badly. We allow shame to steal our joy, doubt to steal our peace, worry to steal our power, and we allow fear to control us. All in which are meant to destroy us!
I’m guilty of allowing all of those vices to constantly withdraw from my account within until life left me in a negative balance. It took me to have a negative balance in my bank account for me to listen to God speak. My account had overdraft because there were too many withdrawals in my life and not enough deposits. (more…)
With all of the drama occurring in the White House, drama in our neighborhoods, drama even in our households, and our workplace. Dealing with difficult people happens to be a reoccurring situation that happens on a daily basis. Everyone is stressed and overwhelmed. You end up dealing others people’s issues as they are yelling, screaming, cursing, and displaying rudeness.
So coming across a difficult person may be quite common than unusual, which is the sad part. I have dealt with many circumstances with dealing with difficult people in my life, in which I constantly try to raise above the mess they carry around. Raising above also protects yourself from the energy that others display and stop it from transferring over to you. Here are five ways to deal with difficult people: (more…)
Excitement begins to fill the heart with joy and then anxiousness begins to creep in to your heart when a new and exciting phenomenon has entered into your life. Anxiousness allows you to run–speaking too soon. It’s in that moment, when it’s always best to pause and listen to what excitement is trying to tell you rather than to react right away.
I would coincide my feeling of excitement with anxiousness all the time. Excitement is a great feeling of eagerness and enthusiasts about a point in time. Anxiousness is a mental state of distress or uneasiness when operating in fear.
Have you ever had something great happen to you or a great idea; and the first thought you had was to run and tell someone the great thing(s) you experienced? The response you receive is either blah, dry, or negative? It’s in that moment that you begin to recognize that maybe it was best to keep what you had for yourself and not for others.
It’s scientifically proven that it takes the mind 21 days to develop an habit. Meditation is a good habit to implement into your life. Oprah And Deepak’s 21 Day Meditation is a great place to start.
Practicing stillness is vital for the spirit to connect with God and your higher self. I was in process of becoming into my own; stillness and peace was what I needed in order shed the old and began to live in the new.
I was at point in my life, where I was facing many trials and tribulations. I was heading into change but I was afraid to endure it! I was nervous because of what life had already given me, and what life was awaiting to offer me. I was functioning in the spiritual realm with hopes of manifesting my true desires in life. I just did not know how to do it. (more…)
I would use my mouth as a weapon to get my way and hurt others when they hurt me! It was something I grew up seeing. I seen that it worked, so I tried it. For me, it worked for so long than trouble began to follow.
When I was really wounded and insecure. I would find joy in talking about others. I guess, you could say that I was glad to find out what other people’s flaws were to distract myself from my own. I didn’t want no one to hear about my flaws because I grew up being reminded of them constantly. (more…)
“ Time is money,” which is a slogan the Hip Hop culture tends to proclaim. There are many different interpretations to this phrase, but what does it truly mean? I believe it speak differently to people; but what comes to my mind is that time is valuable and you must move in a fast pace to reach your goals. Being honest, I lived by that concept a lot.
Being broke, not having much to live on or survive. It’s so easy to develop a hustler’s mentality, which you have to “ bust moves” before the next person does, or hurry up to collect thing living with the fear of lack and loss. Anxiety begins to creep up when you are unable to complete things at certain time frame. (more…)
We have to be careful of the energy that we send to others. As you turn on the television, you will began to see a lot of negative energy or fearful energy sent from the news or reality shows. It’s so easy to focus on your own desires and shunned out the desires of others. Especially when we are filled up with pain and sorrow. Hurt people hurt people.
When you are recovering from past mistakes, others mistakes placed on you, family issues, or work issues. Your mind is trying to learn a new way of handling things. It can become easy to believe those old thoughts and repeat old habits and repeat the same cycle that contributes to your current situation. (more…)
Change is vital in life. The older we get the more it seems harder to embrace change. The definition of change is an act of becoming someone different. Now embracing the uniqueness in others is now becoming a trend among our society. It’s good being different from others . I mean even 2 Chainz the Rapper embraced the concept of being different by making a song called I’m Different.
If we can began to embrace the concept of being different as society then why is it still hard to embrace change? In hindsight, change should be something we should be able to flow with in life. We should be as excited about change because it allows us to walk in newness of life; which means our past is literally gone. It’s gone until we make a decision to not allow it back in our life. I hope you decide not to do so. (more…)
I always felt that having expectations was essential to the manifestation of life. If I expected, then I shall receive? The true definition of expectations is having a strong belief that something will happen in the near future.
I thought expectations worked because they were placed on me as a child, but being honest with my self! I hated when expectations were placed on me because most of the time I knew I could not reach up too them. It didn’t correspond to my true self.
Even though I hated expectations, learned behavior required that I keep expectations for comfort sake. So expectations became a big factor in my relationships especially with my spouse.
When my spouse did not meet my expectations I allowed myself to fall into disappointment and discouragement about our relationship. With feeling disappointment and discouragement, opened the door for resentful and angry to settle in my head about our relationship. (more…)
When you think of the recovery stage in life, you may associated with business, rehabilitation physically and mentally, and family circumstances. The first thing that pops in my head about recovery is drug recovery. The reason being is due to me being surrounded by that population in my career field and having love ones go through it.
Little did I know, I was going through my recovery stage myself with past heart issues! I had to acknowledged that my trauma occurred ,but it was time to recovery from them. Recovery is a stage to help individuals return to their natural state of health mentally or physically before the dysfunction occurred. For those who have had surgical procedures, pain is apart of the entire process.
There is pain in the beginning of the surgery, which is the reason for procedure. There is also pain in the recovery stage after the surgery, which fixes the dysfunction that needed to be corrected.
See when you grow up with verbal, emotional, and physical abuse. It’s so easy to wake up to a distorted mirror everyday. Wishing and comparing yourself to others. Wishing you were someone else with hopes that maybe they do not struggle the way you did.
You never seem understand to why revealing your true self will ever be acceptable? When you replay the distortion images in your head that you are fat, ugly, unlovable, stupid, a bitch, and nappy headed.
Sometimes you are not aware where those images come from, but when good opportunities show up. The images began to pop up again. You began to self- sabotage yourself from things God wants you to have.
You began to believe those names that have latched to your image due to trauma. You believe who others say you are because you love them and for some reason value their opinions. You are then faced looking in the mirror constantly staring at a distorted image of yourself. (more…)
Letting go is something I have always been reminded by God constantly to do. I was so focused on the action of change that I did not realize that I was still holding on to hurt. I had to give myself credit for having so much energy while I was still holding on to hurtful things and helping others with theirs.
Shedding old beliefs can be difficult, but it is achievable. I had a lot of old beliefs that kept me bounded within. The old beliefs made me believe that I could be only what my mind told me what I could be.
Proverbs 23:7 KJV, states, “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.”
Our thoughts create our reality, which explains why the enemy is after people’s thoughts. When he attacks and mental health issues occur. He has gotten into our thoughts by poisoning them with a negative illusion. Change is a process, but it starts with our thoughts first and foremost. (more…)
God has a wonderful way of showing us his magnificent way of loving us unconditionally. His grace for us all is great example.
John 3:16 CEV, “God loved the people of this world so much that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who has faith in him will have eternal life and never really die.”
The world teaches us that perfect is the way to be and perfect is who we are. When it comes to insecurities many are not willing to accept who they truly are because it goes against the illusion that has been embedded in us since we were a child. “ That image is everything”.
Insecurities comes from uncertainty, lack appreciation and love for self. It is so easy to fall in the arms of insecurity when our heart is broken. It is also easy to fall in the arms of insecurity when we are filled with bitterness, hate, jealousy, anger, embarrassment, and an unforgiving heart.
The Crown lays within the soul,but it’s the enduring and learning from your suffering that promotes change. The change within leads to the “Effect”.
The crown effect is not about having power and using your power to commit evil! The gifts and the talents that lie within, are meant to be used to promote positivity and bring Glory to the Lord.
True power comes from the Lord, who promote your gifts to prosper in life. The promotion of your gifts leads to abundance on Earth as it is in Heaven. True power requires strength, endurance, faith, love, and compassion.
I am an millennial. I am individual who likes to get straight to the point of conditions and get things done right away. With that being said, I am use to things moving fast in life. I am use to high speed internet, fast food, social media, GPS, streaming music and shows, and etc. (more…)
Having the ability to stand your ground in life, whether it’s personal or professional is very important. Standing your ground gives you the ability to protect what is yours. We live in society, where our eyes are deceptive to what is good in this world. We believe that what is good for others must be good for us also. Having that perspective allows us to miss out on what God has for us. Having a perfectionist issue, I use to want good in my life so bad that I would want what others wanted also.
I carried a heart wrapped with barbed wire for years. I would tell myself repeatedly that I would not allow my heart to feel pain anymore, so I wrapped it up letting just enough love in to get me by. Since allowing barbed wire to be wrapped was not the essences of my spirit; life gave me more situations and circumstances that would later influence me to capitulate to God’s demand. I walked around with an S on my chest, thinking I was winning against those who wronged me and life.
When life left me, I found out that I needed to love to receive what I needed back. Having barbed wire across my heart placed limitations on my mind, body, and soul, but it was also created as a protection for me from experiencing that same hurt I felt previously. I didn’t have room to love God, myself, and others the way I needed too appropriately. I was much like the others in (more…)
I have spent countless years searching for someone to accept me for who I am. That is where people pleasing came in. I felt that if I gave my all to my relationships with people. I would finally receive the acceptance I always desired in my heart.
After being lied on and facing my name and my character being scrutinized and contaminated in a public work setting for child abuse. My past of childhood trauma of verbal, emotional ,sexual, physical abuse ,and seeing domestic violence threatening my future. I was facing financial issues.
If you love her, treat her well. Makes sense when we are talking about being in a intimate relationship, but can we apply that phrase to self ? I would define Self-Love as liking and accepting oneself for who they truly are soulfully.
The year of 2018 was a year of letting go and growth. Going in 2018, I thought it was going to be this magnificent year, where my life would be free of hurt, pain, and sorrow from the previous years that once held me back from being my true self. That was true, but since …
God kept reminding and showing me for years that I was operating in two different dimensions. I could not figure out what the two were until two months ago. He revealed to me that I was battling between the ego and the soul.
Four years ago on Tumblr, I fell in love with a quote that said “ Starve the ego and feed the soul!” It spoke volumes to me. The only problem was that I was unfamiliar with how to starve my ego and feed my soul.
Two months ago, God brought that same quote to me I seen on Tumblr to me again. It helped me remember what I was fighting, and I began to explore the aspects of the two terms.
Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines Ego as the self especially as contrasted with another self of the world. Freud describes the ego to be the psychological component of the personality of a person that’s driven by our conscious decision making. Many would also consider Ego as Pride. The characteristics of Ego are serve yourself, seek gratification, believe that life is a competition, preserve yourself, looking outward for answers, having the feeling of lack, mortal, drawn to lust, seek wisdom, and seek to be filled. The keyword for ego is me. (more…)
I’m from Milwaukee, WI like other cities in United States; where peace is an expense rather than a necessity. Having peace is not the norm but blending with the crowd is. The crowd is not in the best shape, but many would rather choose to follow what they see than what they know. The norm is being chaotic and peace is being abnormal. The energy is thick. That same thick energy described is what followed me daily.
Between working, going to school for my masters, completing internship hours, attending to my client’s (youth) needs, planning and facilitating a girl’s group, healing spiritually and mentally, attending to my family’s needs, attending church, trying to stay consistent with my destiny, and attending to my partner’s and I personal tests and trials.
Women are biologically nurturing and caring, but it is emotional, mental, spiritual, physical, and financial pain that steer women away from our biological instinct. Hurt leads us down a road of bitterness, greediness, stubbornness, selfishness, anger, depression, pride, and envy.
For those who are inspired by us, look for the comfort, nurture, and support that we naturally bring to relationships. When we are not in the position to do so, our incapability to give our gifts leads to those we inspired by us to stray in a direction that leads to more pain and sorrow. Now, we have transferred our same sorrows and pain to those that need us and who are apart our lives.
Ask yourself what stops you from showing up as yourself? What stops you from becoming more? What stops you from interacting with others as you should? What stops you from showcasing your talent and gifts to others that need it? I cannot speak for you, but I know most of the time it’s my social …
Emotional trauma stems from overwhelming and stressful events that affect your sense of security and wellbeing. Emotional trauma can make you feel helpless and fearful of the world around you. The cause of the emotional trauma comes from experiences often involving a threat to someone’s life or safety, where it leaves you in an overwhelming …
We must admit that many of us would be nothing if it were not for God. There is too many walking with pride too afraid to admit that they need to be close to God. There are too many people, who want the rewards of God such as light, pureness, and the unconditional love, but …
The title of this blog post can be controversial and contradicting because we are told that lust and love cannot co-exist with one another. I believe it to be true. As I grow as a spiritual being. I discover that lust can be an indicator to let us know what it is that we really …
I know it’s a question that many of us are wondering. Who took our stuff? Who is in charge of taking the most precious things around us? I found myself walking in fear until I began to recognize who was for me (Jesus/God). Romans 8:31 CEV,” What can we say about all this? If …
What expectations do you hold in your relationship sectors? Would you consider your expectations to be healthy or unhealthy for your relationship sectors? Have you ever held on to expectations within your relationships that were so high for someone you loved and the person let you down so terribly? Have you expected the best for …
Our society does not value family, which is revealed in what we invest our time and money in. For Generations, it seems like families have been a burden more than a blessing. We do not invest in our children because many of us have not been delivered from our childhood. We do not invest in …
There are so many relationships currently ruined because small circumstances developed into big situations. This occurs pretty much everywhere, and no one wants to talk about it. We would rather gossip about the situations or jump to conclusions about it. This occurs pretty much everywhere. Well, in this blog post will we will hold the …
My 28th birthday is coming up and I’ve been contemplating the large number of lessons I learned during my 27th year. I fought a lot of battles within–mentally, spiritually, physically, emotionally, and financially. Calling a spade, a spade, I have gained so much and lost a lot! I finally feel like I am progressing in my …
An important trait for all relationships to have is to sustain its connection is trust. When trust is broken, it is hard to sustain the bond. It is hard to rely on whether the person’s intentions for you are good or bad. There so many people bleeding and looking to be healed. They are walking around bleeding …